[Book Summary] 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do—Amy Morin

Rating: ★★★★☆

This book is recommended by one of my mentors. If I could have listened to this audiobook earlier, it would have saved me from figuring some rules out myself.

Rule 1: They Don't Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves.

This reminded me of a mantra told by Jonathan Lipnicki in Mayim Bialik's podcast Mayim Bialik's Breakdown. I'm going to quote it here.

I can feel poorly but not poor me.

One solution in this book is getting away from the environment triggering the feeling and participating in activities that relocate your attention.

My solution was born when I couldn't get a job after my 2020 graduation. I was so desperate. At that time, I figured that my pain/suffering/struggle are shared by many others before me (and after me, unfortunately). If you search around, you'll see international students from universities ranked higher than UM have been put under the same challenge. 

Not to mention the work VISA situation has become worse since 2020. If you're interested in studying abroad, maybe consider other countries like Canada, the UK, Germany, France, or Israel. H-1B lottery isn't the game to play.

Rule 2: They Don't Give Away Their Power.

Rule 3: They Don't Shy Away from Change.

Rule 4: They Don't Focus on Things They Can't Control.

As I'm writing this article, USCIS missed my second H-1B petition in 2022. I have one more petition left in 2023 which doesn't seem promising by all means.

However, that's something I can't control. Will there be a second-round or a third-round? I can't control it, either.

What can I do then? Start contacting law firms and get their evaluations on my EB-2 NIW case. If it seems feasible, I'll play this game rather than waiting for lady Goldilocks' favor in the 2023 H-1B lottery.

Rule 5: They Don't Worry about Pleasing Everyone.

My mentor suggests a specific book on this topic. The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fxxk. I told him that I'm pretty sure that the author is American and I'm right.

Rule 6: They Don't Fear Taking Calculated Risks.

Rule 7: They Don't Dwell on the Past.

Rule 8: They Don't Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over.

Rule 9: They Don't Resent Other People's Success.

Rule 10: They Don't Give Up after the First Failure.

Rule 11: They Don't Fear Alone Time.

Rule 12: They Don't Feel the World Owes Them Anything.

Rule 13: They Don't Expect Immediate Results.